Thursday, August 06, 2009

 

Mark 1: 1-8, wherein John the Baptist comes across like R.W. Schambach

This here is how the good news of Jesus Christ, whose Paw is God, got started and all. Just like that ol’ know-it-all Isaiah wrote back in the old days, “Looky here, I’m sendin’ out an ol’ boy ahead of you with a tale to get people to thinkin’ – he’ll be out in the country preachin’ and hollerin’, hoein’ out a nice, straight path for the Lord.

John the baptizer came out of nowhere from out in the sticks, tellin’ everybody they needed to let him throw ‘em down in some river water and waller ‘em around and agitate ‘em some to soften up their sin and badness so they could turn to God for help and forgiveness. Country folks from the whole territory around Judea and city slickers from Jerusalem were all comin’ out and listenin’ to him and getting’ dunked in the Jordan River.

Now John was a sight, with an outfit made out of camel hair and a strap of leather around his middle, and danged if he wasn’t livin’ on locusts and honey he’d swiped from bees’ hives. He declared:

“There’s an Ol’ Boy a-comin’, ha, who’s so intense-aha, he’ll make me look like a pantywaist-aha! Amen! Praise God! I wouldn’t deserve-aha, to get the honor of loosenin’ his bootlaces-ah. All I’ve done is throw y’all in the river water, hallelujah, and bring you up rinsed off some! Glory! He’ll throw y’all smack-dab into the whirlin’ vortex of the Holy Ghost-aha, and the undertow’ll shoot you all through and out the other siiide-aha! You’ll get all hosed out on the inside-ah and hosed off on the outside-ah! Can I get an Amen?”

--ER

Comments:
I used to listen to RW on the radio...once he said the doctors @ one hospital was sore at him for cuttin into their business cause he went on one floor and healed all the patients...I met him years later in the waitin room @ MD-Anderson...his wife was havin cancer surgery...I felt sorry for him on many levels...I likes prophet John, and the only similarities with RW mighta been in volume, not content...course I's ain't preachin at you Rudy
 
Volumn only, absolutely. ... My first job as a little bitty media peep was at a Southern-fried Gospel radidio station in Arkansas back in '82-'83. I heard Schambach and all them ol' boys.
 
Jumpin the gun a bit on the introduction of the Holy Ghost are we not?
 
Huh?

Mark 1:8, KJV, John talking:

"I indeed have baptized you with water: but he shall baptize you with the Holy Ghost."
 
So? You mean the Holy Spirit was here before the Pentecost?
 
Hola Sr. Redneck. Me parece muy agradable tu blog. Yo soy el mentor del Sr. Beel Loney. Él me dice de su blog. He es mucho más loco de mushrooms y liquor. No le permita que pedir lend monies. Sr. Beel also tienen una tail y see mucho Sasquatch, pero me encanta el weirdo. Voy a permanecer con él en la montaña Loney pronto. Hablar más later. Adiós Sr. Redneck
 
También decir que vigilar for Feodor, que sometimes un burro...Laugh en voz alta!
 
Eres una puta, Dr. Bill.
 
Why the half-hidden, non-sequitur remark from you and the long dressing down of tossed off remarks by GKS?

You guys have pent up issues?
 
Pues, ciera mi vaca! Caca de Dios!
 
Sr. Grande, I made the mistake of checking this with my cell phone in bed at 4 a.m. and got so cracked up a tu mejicana pigeona I couldn't go back to sleep!

(-: RMF :-)
 
Sr. Dr. Nachos

you crazy beaner!! if yous comin to stay at the Loneys you better start talkin more American...I see your Mexican still sucks too. We'sa have a fiester when you get here. BTW Nachos, no diga la materia privada en el webbernet, dumbass, cuz Sr. Feodor es un poco seco Yankee, no mucho humor. Sorry, I aint made the talk since I visited you last.

And Feo, aint no use to start early mornin cussin...least not til I've had a drink or 3...and mayo un emú caca en su café

Adios
 
Dr. Beel siento ... espero para el próximo coyote para que a través de mí, luego a Loney monte ... Necesito una cama, el tequila, el spam, y tortillas de mi estancia ... También, quiero cumplir con este Sr. Feodor y patear el trasero ... más tarde mi amigo Hillbilly
 
Tengo el gran humor, cuando el humor es una gran.

Escucha, las pequeñas bolas, con palo de patadas a su esposa.
 
Ah, carumba!
 
Oy vey!
 
hijo único? Creo que ... dejar de actuar como un asno pussified y fer una vez un chico ... patear esposa ... menos la mía no puede látigo mi trasero, pero podría probablemente látigo tuyo
 
¿Cuántas veces tengo que ras antes de irse?
 
Dr. Bill's done went to speakin' in tongues!
 
Amén Beel Sra. Dr. Loney podría patear el trasero ... laugh en voz alta!!! Un gatito que seguramente!
 
Sr. Feodor le gana a la mujer de hasta ... rodando por los motivos entre Laredo y San Antonio ... me surprising, el Wi-Fi de aquí es muy buena!
 
I don't want to hear what you do to kittens.

That cast-iron skillet doesn't cook itself.
 
Nachos--San Antonio? Holler when you get near Houston...I'sa come down and we can visit the local abrevaderio...vayar con Dios
 
Alright...Alright

Nachos, from now on, we's just gonna talk to the fellers
 
Beel decir lo que mi amigo
 
thankys
 
no hay problema
 
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