Rev. Erudite Redneck, B.S., B.S., M.A., M.Div.

Only vaguely related: Do you listen to Speaking of Faith? If not, you might be interested in the most recent interview: http://speakingoffaith.publicradio.org/programs/2009/restoringthesenses/
 

I have often wondered what Jesus was doing between his resurrection and his ascension. At least one guy wrote a book about it but it doesn't tell you much. Let's see, there was the on the road thing, then the upper room one and upper room two, and the 500 looking down from the air, breakfast by the sea with the boys ( generally considered to be a 2nd century addition and a geometria puzzle at that), maybe a family visit, and well... what ever. Now that didn't take up all 40 days. So what do you think? What was he doing on earth before he ascended to heaven.
 

Startling the hell out of people.
 

BTW, I just did a little figuring.

Assuming a steady Ascencion rate of 7 mph, the Lord wouldn't even be out of our solar system yet. He'd be just less than 2.5 million miles out. Not even to Jupiter.
 

Escaping earth's gravatational force with that low speed would have to classified as one of Jesus' miracles would it not?

With that calculation in mind then we need to examine the various "Voyager" photographs that looked back towards earth as they left the solar system.
 

Perhaps Jesus's ascension is at a constant acceleration, much like the newer space probes powered by ion drive. They start out slow, but with a constant acceleration over a long period of time they get up to some pretty amazing speeds.

That also gets around the problem of accelerating so fast from a stand-still that Jesus squishes himself with G-forces, which would sort of make the whole crucifixion a bit pointless.

That's all assuming that Jesus doesn't have some sort of fancy faster than light travel. Given that he's already broken one natural law via resurrection, I suppose he can probably break the speed of light limit somehow too.

(BTW, I've always assumed much of the 40 days was taken up by him having to listen to massive amounts of guilt from his Jewish mother. "No, no ... you go off and get crucified, then just show up again. You don't call. You don't write. Don't worry about me, I'll be fine. Do as you please, you will anyway. Now eat something, look at you, you look oysgedart. Oi, gevald!"
 

Wouldn't a real human body at about 30,000 feet have some really serious issues with continuity?
The physics of the Rapture have always bothered me.
 

That's why clever Christians always keep a pressure suit in the trunk.

I got mine off eBay.
 

Total Triva:
The high altitude pressure suit was invented by a one eyed Oklahoma oil field roustabout with a criminal record. Guess he may have opened the door to heaven so to speak.
 

Ack! Gonna have to turn in my Okie card! Can't remember his name!