Saturday, August 23, 2008

 

We interrupt this program ...

... which was supposed to be a "good news" account of today, wherein we got Dr. ER's lil place in Boulder, which she christened "The Hole" because it was so small, empty, cleaned and her minimal things loaded into the smallest truck U-Haul rents out, which I'm calling Baby Truck, and that we were back to the hotel in Westminster, on the northwest side of Denver, looking forward to the trip back, especially me, since the Baby Truck is still bigger than ary a personal car or truck and it's fun to drive, but ...

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

The friend I asked to come by and feed our livestock just called and said that the reason the Coke cans in our pantry had exploded and bumped the pantry door open and soaked the carpet was because we got a hot water leak in the bathroom that abuts the pantry and the heat caused the Cokes to explode, which is a NOTHING problem compared to the ^&*^$^ water leak itself, since SHEETROCK -- and the trademark cops can kiss my ass -- the SHEETROCK brand gypsum fricking wallboard will wick that water up into the wall so fast it ain't funny, which means the whole &*^$^ wall will have to be torn out and replaced, plus there's the plumbing work, plus the &*^&$^* carpet, and perhaps plus even the ^(*&*%* tile in the kitchen if the water damage went that far.

And, I am so sorry, as often as I drop the bomb, to my embarassment and sometimes shame, in the real world, I very, very rarely do so in the sacred space of the ER Roadhouse.

But, I just have to say:

FUCK!

That is all.

--ER

Comments:
Bummer!
Maybe it won't actually be as bad as you think.
 
Yeesh. I hope so. Thanks to my catastrophic thinking skills, I always assume the worst.
 
Indeed. Please say, that at the least, the water was shut off to stop the carnage.

And in this situation, a well-placed F bomb is appropriate.
 
And please remember the two magic words that make life better:

"Homeowner's Insurance."
 
My livestock wrangler called the city to come out and turn off the water.

Homeowners insurance generally doesn't cover water damage, but we'll check.
 
I will second your profane and highly appropriate expletive ... the situation sounds fecally enhanced and if your homeowners doesn't cover it a second Fuck would be appropriate then as well (but then again a second one isn't always possible right away ... a refractory period I beleive it is called)
 
As a victim of flooding, you have my most sincere sympathies. I recall dropping a few bombs myself at the time.
 
Oh, that just sucks. I was going to say stinks, but since you opened the door with the eff word...

Really - I hate this for you guys. Just what you don't need.
 
I, too, do not thing the little ol' word is inappropriate. God knows I'd be whispering it, at the very least, had the same thing happened to us.

Safe trip, peeps. Have some quality time, hold hands on the road, smooch at red lights, and buy a Slapout hat while you're at it. If you already have one, you can send it to me, and I'll send you the dough. Seriously. How many people in northern IL will be able to say they own a cap from Slapout, OK?

I just have to get there. I just have to.
 
Homeowners insurance generally doesn't cover FLOODING.But damage from a blowed up water heater should be covered. Check at the least. I think you'll be happier. People complain about homeowners' insurance but I have had to make a few claims in my life and I've always been very, very pleased with prompt service and good results.
 
That's the type of bad news that I don't think I would have wanted any details on from a distance. Your friend took care of getting the water turned off, and there isn't anything you can do until you're back so why give you information to fret about for hundreds of miles on your way home?
 
Well, actually, I was involved, from afar, in figuring out what was going on and what to do immediately. Plus, my livestock wrangler friend is a fellow journalist; reporters report. :-)

No fretting here. It is what it is. Today, I've the fun, or at least differentness, of drivin' the Baby Truck about 700 miles! Yee haw!
 
Thanks, MA, DCup, and all.
 
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