Tuesday, June 19, 2007
You know yer a Texan or an Okie if:
(Thanks to the Dallas Ranch Branch of the Extended ER family!)
1. (Texas) You can properly pronounce Corsicana, Palestine, Decatur, Wichita Falls, San Antonio, Burnet, Boerne, Nacogdoches, Mexia, Waco, Amarillo, and Waxahachie.
(Oklahoma) Chickasha, Poteau, Pushmataha, Miami, Potawatomie, and Oolagah.
The rest are in the first comment!
--ER
1. (Texas) You can properly pronounce Corsicana, Palestine, Decatur, Wichita Falls, San Antonio, Burnet, Boerne, Nacogdoches, Mexia, Waco, Amarillo, and Waxahachie.
(Oklahoma) Chickasha, Poteau, Pushmataha, Miami, Potawatomie, and Oolagah.
The rest are in the first comment!
--ER
Comments:
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2. A tornado warning siren is your signal to go out in the yard and look for a funnel.
3. You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
4. You know that the true value of a parking space is not determined by the distance to the door, but by the availability of shade.
5. Stores don't have bags, they have sacks.
6. You measure distance in minutes.
7. You go to the lake because you think it is like going to the ocean.
8. You listen to the weather forecast before picking out an outfit
9. You know cow-pies are not made of beef. (You know that cow-patty bingo is not played indoors! -- ER)
10. Someone you know has used a football schedule to plan their wedding date.
11. You aren't surprised to find movie rental, ammunition, and bait all in the same store.
12. Your "place at the lake" has wheels under it.
13. You know everything goes better with ranch dressin'.
14. You actually understand this and you are "fixin' to" send it to your friends.
15. Finally, you are 100% Texan-Okie if you have ever heard this conversation:
"You wanna coke?"
"Yeah."
"What kind?"
"Dr. Pepper."
3. You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
4. You know that the true value of a parking space is not determined by the distance to the door, but by the availability of shade.
5. Stores don't have bags, they have sacks.
6. You measure distance in minutes.
7. You go to the lake because you think it is like going to the ocean.
8. You listen to the weather forecast before picking out an outfit
9. You know cow-pies are not made of beef. (You know that cow-patty bingo is not played indoors! -- ER)
10. Someone you know has used a football schedule to plan their wedding date.
11. You aren't surprised to find movie rental, ammunition, and bait all in the same store.
12. Your "place at the lake" has wheels under it.
13. You know everything goes better with ranch dressin'.
14. You actually understand this and you are "fixin' to" send it to your friends.
15. Finally, you are 100% Texan-Okie if you have ever heard this conversation:
"You wanna coke?"
"Yeah."
"What kind?"
"Dr. Pepper."
Four or Five miles south of Webbers Falls, Ok. Drago's Gun shop. I was standing there holding a 28 lb, 50 cal. sniper rifle (made from a barrel off-en a big ole ship) and through the beads hanging from top a doorway was some nice ladies under hair dryers in the hair salon. That's Oklahoma fer sur!
# posted by 
: 1:31 PM
: 1:31 PM
Western NY has its own peculiarities. There is Madrid, Cuba, Charlotte, and, of course, my favorite, Skeneatles. If you can type out the proper pronunciation to these, you win an all-expenses paid trip to next year's Hot Dog Day festival in Alfred, NY, courtesy of someone with money.
As I had no takers, they are, in order:
MAA-drid
KOO-bah
shi-LOT or sh-LOT
SKIN-ee-AT-liss
An extra bonus is the city of RAH-ch-ster
So far, IL is the only state I have lived in without its peculiar place names. I suppose TX would win if only because of its size.
MAA-drid
KOO-bah
shi-LOT or sh-LOT
SKIN-ee-AT-liss
An extra bonus is the city of RAH-ch-ster
So far, IL is the only state I have lived in without its peculiar place names. I suppose TX would win if only because of its size.
There are, however, the towns of Plano and Sandwich, next to each other on US Rte 30. In the days before the 'burbs spread southwest, and there were actually miles between these burgs, my wife always imagined the town of "Bologna" - Plano, Bologna, Sandwich . . .
Ha!
In southeast Oklahoma is Snow and, down the road a few miles, Ice.
The town of Chickie-Chockie, now known as just Chockie (where Reba McEntire is actually from, not Stringtown, not Kiowa, not Atoka or Durant, although all have valid reasond to claim her).
In Arkansas is Toadsuck Ferry.
Oh, and north of where I grew up is Long, and Short. And southeast is a geographic feature, a swamp, called Devil's Slough. Whi ch should've been in "The Pilgrim's Progress."
Maybe I'll write up an allegory and call it "The Redneck Pilgrim's Progress." ...
In southeast Oklahoma is Snow and, down the road a few miles, Ice.
The town of Chickie-Chockie, now known as just Chockie (where Reba McEntire is actually from, not Stringtown, not Kiowa, not Atoka or Durant, although all have valid reasond to claim her).
In Arkansas is Toadsuck Ferry.
Oh, and north of where I grew up is Long, and Short. And southeast is a geographic feature, a swamp, called Devil's Slough. Whi ch should've been in "The Pilgrim's Progress."
Maybe I'll write up an allegory and call it "The Redneck Pilgrim's Progress." ...
Don't forget the beautiful irony that in order to get to Nowata,OK, one should take the Lotawata exit. I'm a fifth generation Okie "doin' time" in central Texas, so our town names don't faze me. There are two that had me guessing for a while in Missouri: Laquey (Lakeway)and Versailles (ver-SAY-els). The French founders of those towns are spinning in their graves.
# posted by : 7:13 PM
: 7:13 PM
Yep, and the Lotawatah Road exit off of I-40 is right at Lake Eufaula!
Hey, the locals had me fooled into thinkin' there was a town called Kiwani for awhile. You know, on U.S. 287 between Vernon and Childress, about 80 miles northwest of Wichita Falls? Town's named for the famous Comanche chief, the last one to surrender. It wadn't Kiwani, (pronounced like the service club).
Quanah.
Hey, the locals had me fooled into thinkin' there was a town called Kiwani for awhile. You know, on U.S. 287 between Vernon and Childress, about 80 miles northwest of Wichita Falls? Town's named for the famous Comanche chief, the last one to surrender. It wadn't Kiwani, (pronounced like the service club).
Quanah.
Lordy, LeeAnn's comments brought to mind Marseilles, IL, just west of Joliet. The good folks of the Illinois Valley pronounce it mar-SAILS.
Near where we lived, and where I worked for most of the five years we were in Lisa's last appointment, is Starved Rock State Park, so named because in the 17th Century, one tribe of Indians trapped a band from an enemy tribe (I can never remember who was which) on top of a mesa along the Illinois River until they starved to death. It's one of the busiest state parks in the Prairie State.
There is something almost surreal about all these odd place names. Were one to be a bit more skeptical, one could argue that such silly place names couldn't possibly be true. I love this. Keep up the stories and names.
Near where we lived, and where I worked for most of the five years we were in Lisa's last appointment, is Starved Rock State Park, so named because in the 17th Century, one tribe of Indians trapped a band from an enemy tribe (I can never remember who was which) on top of a mesa along the Illinois River until they starved to death. It's one of the busiest state parks in the Prairie State.
There is something almost surreal about all these odd place names. Were one to be a bit more skeptical, one could argue that such silly place names couldn't possibly be true. I love this. Keep up the stories and names.
On a more somber note, near where Custer and his men mowed down 1oo or so mostly women and children at Black Kettle's village, in present western Oklahoma, in 1868, is Dead Indian Lake.
It's not far from Dead Woman's Crossing, site of a persistent ghost story.
On a lighter note, sometimes people try too hard. I heard a national TV newsperson once misprounce the town of Muleshoe, Texas, as "mule-ess-ho."
It's not far from Dead Woman's Crossing, site of a persistent ghost story.
On a lighter note, sometimes people try too hard. I heard a national TV newsperson once misprounce the town of Muleshoe, Texas, as "mule-ess-ho."
Oh, and there is the great, probably apocryphal, tale out of Waxahachie (wocks-a-hatchie) in Texas.
Before Congress defunded the Super Conducting Super Collider project, which was already well under construction, it is said that a D.C. wonk or Yankee scientist or some such, new in town, asked a young lady behind the counter at a local eatery, "How do you say the name of this place? Please say it clearly."
She replied, "Daaiirryy Queeeeeen."
I LOVE that'un.
Before Congress defunded the Super Conducting Super Collider project, which was already well under construction, it is said that a D.C. wonk or Yankee scientist or some such, new in town, asked a young lady behind the counter at a local eatery, "How do you say the name of this place? Please say it clearly."
She replied, "Daaiirryy Queeeeeen."
I LOVE that'un.
LOL.
During the Revolution, Washington sent General Sullivan to Fort Tioga in present day Athens, PA, my father's home town. At the time, it was the wild frontier. The British were selling booze and guns to the Senecas, inciting them to burn settlement villages and such. Sullivan's orders were to chase them out, or kill them. There was only one battle, near Elmira, NY, but the chase went on.
At one point, Sullivan had them surrounded, but the Indians managed to slip through after having been starved for weeks. They were forced to kill and eat most of their horses. What was left was a pile of horse's heads. Thus, the town Horseheads, NY.
A bit farther west, one of the leaders of the Seneca band was killed in battle. A pole was smeared with his blood according to the Iroquois ritual. Thus, the town of Painted Post, NY. The chase went on until near the present college town of Geneseo, when the Senecas turned towards Canada, and Sullivan hightailed it just in time to miss the battle of Saratoga.
Near my hometown of Waverly, NY is a small glacial moraine hill called Spanish Hill by the locals. During an archaeological dig there in the early 20th century, among many interesting finds was the helmet of a Spanish conquistador. Was it tribute from a southern or western nation of Indians? Was it barter? No one really knows. There is a website and historical information on Spanish Hill, just type it in to your browser, and you'll learn all sorts of interesting things.
During the Revolution, Washington sent General Sullivan to Fort Tioga in present day Athens, PA, my father's home town. At the time, it was the wild frontier. The British were selling booze and guns to the Senecas, inciting them to burn settlement villages and such. Sullivan's orders were to chase them out, or kill them. There was only one battle, near Elmira, NY, but the chase went on.
At one point, Sullivan had them surrounded, but the Indians managed to slip through after having been starved for weeks. They were forced to kill and eat most of their horses. What was left was a pile of horse's heads. Thus, the town Horseheads, NY.
A bit farther west, one of the leaders of the Seneca band was killed in battle. A pole was smeared with his blood according to the Iroquois ritual. Thus, the town of Painted Post, NY. The chase went on until near the present college town of Geneseo, when the Senecas turned towards Canada, and Sullivan hightailed it just in time to miss the battle of Saratoga.
Near my hometown of Waverly, NY is a small glacial moraine hill called Spanish Hill by the locals. During an archaeological dig there in the early 20th century, among many interesting finds was the helmet of a Spanish conquistador. Was it tribute from a southern or western nation of Indians? Was it barter? No one really knows. There is a website and historical information on Spanish Hill, just type it in to your browser, and you'll learn all sorts of interesting things.
ER, don't forget Prague Oklahoma. (that is pronounceded Pray-ugh)
Just for the record, my dad lived in Quanah Parker, Oklahoma till it burned down form a guys burning off his wheat stubble. It was on the Kemp & Kell R.R., West of Eschita in Burk Burnet's Big Pasture of the 6666.
But if you realy want f....d up pronounuations try these:
Gloucester....aka...Glue-ster
Worcester...aka...Woo-ster
That's Mass. talk.
Then there is Houston St. in Macon, Georgia....aka..How-stin St.
and then my favorite is Zzyzx, California. I once got of the main highway and drove into Zzyzx just to find someone who would pronounce it for me. Zzyzx...aka...Zei-zix (rhymes with Isaac's)
See, we ain't the only folks that talk funny.
Just for the record, my dad lived in Quanah Parker, Oklahoma till it burned down form a guys burning off his wheat stubble. It was on the Kemp & Kell R.R., West of Eschita in Burk Burnet's Big Pasture of the 6666.
But if you realy want f....d up pronounuations try these:
Gloucester....aka...Glue-ster
Worcester...aka...Woo-ster
That's Mass. talk.
Then there is Houston St. in Macon, Georgia....aka..How-stin St.
and then my favorite is Zzyzx, California. I once got of the main highway and drove into Zzyzx just to find someone who would pronounce it for me. Zzyzx...aka...Zei-zix (rhymes with Isaac's)
See, we ain't the only folks that talk funny.
Erudite Redneck said...
"Ah, but there is Burnet AND a Burkburnett in Texas."
No shit, well I'll be durn if you aren't right. They any kin to one another you reckon? And of course I was a talkin about the Burnett Burnet not the Burnet Burnet.
Say, tell them the story about the Wewoka Switch,Oklahoma, you know that one near Bowlegs. I heard a guy with an English accent on CNN in Iraq the other day say that most of the money that went to Halliburton was used to buy materials caught in a Wewoka Switch. Damn near fell out of my chair.
Also, what be the difference between a pie and a chip?
"Ah, but there is Burnet AND a Burkburnett in Texas."
No shit, well I'll be durn if you aren't right. They any kin to one another you reckon? And of course I was a talkin about the Burnett Burnet not the Burnet Burnet.
Say, tell them the story about the Wewoka Switch,Oklahoma, you know that one near Bowlegs. I heard a guy with an English accent on CNN in Iraq the other day say that most of the money that went to Halliburton was used to buy materials caught in a Wewoka Switch. Damn near fell out of my chair.
Also, what be the difference between a pie and a chip?
Heck yeh!!
I do know how to pronounce most of those towns. I had to learn "Mexia", but it was simple enough.
Reminds me of the good ole days back in Tejas. Boy, I sure do miss it there!!
And dang it I MISS DR. PEPPER!!!!!!
I do know how to pronounce most of those towns. I had to learn "Mexia", but it was simple enough.
Reminds me of the good ole days back in Tejas. Boy, I sure do miss it there!!
And dang it I MISS DR. PEPPER!!!!!!
I'd say degree of moisture would be the difference in a cow pie and a cow chip!
Wewoka Switch? Do what? Is that an old railroad name for Wewoka? ... I know there's a Bacon Switch in Wichita Falls that used to be its own place.
No Dr. Pepper? Pech, Dr. ER could never live in France.
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Wewoka Switch? Do what? Is that an old railroad name for Wewoka? ... I know there's a Bacon Switch in Wichita Falls that used to be its own place.
No Dr. Pepper? Pech, Dr. ER could never live in France.
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