Thursday, May 24, 2007
Shark Jesus
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Was there a shark John the Baptist, taking believers to the surface to "dry" them in anticipation of the coming Messiah? Did this shark prophet eat nothing but kelp? With the desire for shark fin soup driving large species to extinction, one wonders how he could be crucified . . .
Just questions.
Good luck with the Mountain Cabin hunt. Beware bears and Jeremiah Johnson. And the Denver Broncos.
Just questions.
Good luck with the Mountain Cabin hunt. Beware bears and Jeremiah Johnson. And the Denver Broncos.
AND IN THOSE DAYS, it was said that a bright light led the first witnesses to the humble birth scene, where a BBC reporter, Harold Angel, announced the news to the world:
The Fincarnation.
The Fincarnation.
"I dry thee in the name of the father, and of the son" ... and you pick them up out of the water each time.
# posted by 
: 9:48 AM
: 9:48 AM
Debate soon erupted among the shark's disciples -- his school, if you will -- over whether the baby shark was meant to save all species of hammerheads, or just his own kind.
It would be generations before the meaning of the miracle was understood to extend to all the fishes of the seas.
As with most so-called "miracles," this is all a hoax:
She's no virgin, say friends of 'miracle' shark
Just like the Sharkskin of Turin. *shakes head*
She's no virgin, say friends of 'miracle' shark
Just like the Sharkskin of Turin. *shakes head*
SW, Trixie beat you to it, way up there!
Doubters!
Must you put your fingers in his gills yourself to believe??
Doubters!
Must you put your fingers in his gills yourself to believe??
"Big deal, so Hammerheads can reproduce without sex. Why would you want to?"
--- Tiger Shark Spokesperson
--- Tiger Shark Spokesperson
The Vatican has sent their Devil's Advocate to Nebraska to investigate. However as he entered the tank a shark bit off his foot. Which one he was asked? "I Don't know," he said," All sharks look the same to me."
The Vatican representative was accompanied by a lawyer from the church. When asked why he was not attacked. He just shook his head and said, I guess it was just proffessional courtesy.
The Vatican represenative when interviewed at the hospital was asked about how he felt about being attacked. Well he said, looking to where his leg should have been, at least he didn't get the best of me.
The ACLU has file a brief in Federal Court to prohibit the display of aquarimums if funded with public funds. A bill in the U.S. Senate has been filed to limit any court action on aquariums to those specifically containing sharks.
President Bush, says that this attack on sharks is a Democrat feeding frenzy.
President Bush, says that this attack on sharks is a Democrat feeding frenzy.
Bulletin!!!!
Baby shark eaten by large male shark in the tank with it. According to Rev. Dobson It was the Zionist trying to keep the "second coming" from being fulfilled. Asked how he knew it was a Zionist plot. He replied what else could it have been, it was a lone shark that did it.
OKOK, I Fin-ished
Baby shark eaten by large male shark in the tank with it. According to Rev. Dobson It was the Zionist trying to keep the "second coming" from being fulfilled. Asked how he knew it was a Zionist plot. He replied what else could it have been, it was a lone shark that did it.
OKOK, I Fin-ished
AND THE baby shark saw his reflection in the glass side of the tank and said, "Holy Mackeral! I mean, shark! Holy Shark!"
"Where is he that is born King of the Jaws? for we have seen his gar in the east, and are come to worship him."
Come on ER, just 6 more and you got your fabulous 50. I would have used Star Fish in the East however.
As King of the Jaws, he decended from those who once sojourned in the Land of Ocean.
(Goshen -- it's a stretch)
(Goshen -- it's a stretch)
Congratualtions!
Oh yes, and what did Jesus Shark say while cruising along the swimming beaches of the Sea of Galilee?
"Let the little children come unto me."
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Oh yes, and what did Jesus Shark say while cruising along the swimming beaches of the Sea of Galilee?
"Let the little children come unto me."
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