Thursday, August 24, 2006
'Moo,' y'all
By The Erudite Redneck
The cattle on the farm didn't actually say "moo" when I was growing up. In the heat of the day, they sort of let their mouths hang, the snot drip and muttered, "meeerrrrrr."
Hungry calves said, "mmmmerrrrr-HER!" "mmmmerrrrr-HER!" "mmmmerrrrr-HER!" with kind of a gutteral "H" shifting into a bovine semiyodel falsetto in the second syllable.
Mama cows separated from their calves said, "mmerr-HER!" "mmerr-HER!" "mmerr-HER!" "mmerr-HER!" "mmerr-HER!" "mmerr-HER!" "mmerr-HER!" "mmerr-HER!" "mmerr-HER!" "mmerr-HER!" "mmerr-HER!" "mmerr-HER!" "mmerr-HER!" "mmerr-HER!" "mmerr-HER!" "mmerr-HER!" -- you get the idea -- with the same gutteral "H" shifting into a bovine semiyodel falsetto in the second syllable.
Bulls grunted and sort of growled, seemed like to me.
But then, these were eastern Oklahoma-western Arkansas bovines, the western upland South with a heavy Ozarkian linguistic influence.
Do what?
Yep. Cows have regional accents, according to Reuters.
LONDON (Reuters) - Cows have regional accents, a group of British farmers claims, and phonetics experts say the idea is not as far-fetched as it sounds.
Real all about it!
What do Yankee cows sound like? Midwestern cows? Montana cows? Canadian cows?
What do cows says where you live?
--ER
Comments:
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Ha! Well, why wouldn't the animals have accents? They listen to us humans prattle on and go with it.
Cows around here just seem to be saying "good-bye" as the dairies are being replaced by houses, stores and industrial parks. Even the Mira Loma Horse Ranch seems it has a date with the wrecking ball. Now I won't have foals or calves to watch as I drive along. :(
Wherever they moved, I hope the California cows can understand the other cows, and vice versa. :)
Cows around here just seem to be saying "good-bye" as the dairies are being replaced by houses, stores and industrial parks. Even the Mira Loma Horse Ranch seems it has a date with the wrecking ball. Now I won't have foals or calves to watch as I drive along. :(
Wherever they moved, I hope the California cows can understand the other cows, and vice versa. :)
# posted by 
: 11:40 AM
: 11:40 AM
Not sure cows have accents and all, but I know in diff'rent regions, folks who run cattle have diff'rent ways of talkin' to 'em.
'Round central and western Oklahoma, tain't yehaw, but heyaw. "HeYaw, c'mon. HeYaw. Get in there."
In the Oklahoma Panhandle, it's more, "HAAAA!" or "Scootch!"
On rodeo stock provider, when tryin' to push bulls, makes a noise, "Bzzzzz. Bzzzzz." When I said, "I thought hot shots were illegal to use at rodeos," he said, "The bulls don't know that." He twern't usin' a hot shot, and he was right: the bulls didn't know any better. They scooted jist fine.
Up here in northwest Missouri, my father-in-law says something to the effect of "She-BOZZ." Them momma cows come runnin', knowin' he's about to feed 'em somethin'.
'Round central and western Oklahoma, tain't yehaw, but heyaw. "HeYaw, c'mon. HeYaw. Get in there."
In the Oklahoma Panhandle, it's more, "HAAAA!" or "Scootch!"
On rodeo stock provider, when tryin' to push bulls, makes a noise, "Bzzzzz. Bzzzzz." When I said, "I thought hot shots were illegal to use at rodeos," he said, "The bulls don't know that." He twern't usin' a hot shot, and he was right: the bulls didn't know any better. They scooted jist fine.
Up here in northwest Missouri, my father-in-law says something to the effect of "She-BOZZ." Them momma cows come runnin', knowin' he's about to feed 'em somethin'.
Oregon cows sort of lackadaisically go "muhhh", like they're too mellow to care about self-expression. That's how most Oregonians are: we don't have a twang, a drawl or even precise diction. I call it the Oregon Shuck.
I've noticed among the cows (and this is even more true of sheep)that there is always one or two that don't sound like animals at all, but like People Trying To Imitate An Animal.
Anyone else notice that one?
I've noticed among the cows (and this is even more true of sheep)that there is always one or two that don't sound like animals at all, but like People Trying To Imitate An Animal.
Anyone else notice that one?
That sounds like a story I read today in the paper about Bush. They said when he is in a group with no media around he sounds a lot smarter than when they are. The guy said when speaking he sounds like English is his second language, and it really is, Washington English that is. When speaking Texas English he sounds a lot smarter. When he's trying to sound like everyone wants him to he trips over the words.
# posted by : 1:45 PM
: 1:45 PM
Cow Query:
Saw some cows in Colorado like that "white face Angus" in your picture but they had broad white stripes all the way around the middle of their body.
What were they?
Saw some cows in Colorado like that "white face Angus" in your picture but they had broad white stripes all the way around the middle of their body.
What were they?
# posted by : 2:11 PM
: 2:11 PM
Would it be offensive to my vegetarian friends out there if I said that cows around here said, "sizzzzzzzllllle..."?
(That's mostly a joke, I hardly eat cow anymore and just ain't that big a fan.)
(That's mostly a joke, I hardly eat cow anymore and just ain't that big a fan.)
Nonsense teditor they had horns.
Real question, what kind of cows have black rear end a white middle and a black front end?
Come on you farm types, give.
Real question, what kind of cows have black rear end a white middle and a black front end?
Come on you farm types, give.
# posted by : 3:17 PM
: 3:17 PM
Forget the Cow Query, found them on the web finally. Did I mention that they were furry too.
# posted by : 3:21 PM
: 3:21 PM
Anon, I don't doubt that about el presidente. But he shoulda figured that out by nowand quit trying to talk Washingtonese.
It's like when I'm standing in front of a room ful of eggheads, like I'm fixing to do in October to talk about some research.
If I try to sound like them, I sound like a dolt. I speak pidgeon-egghead.
If I talk like I talk, I sound like who I am: a redneck who's done a bunch of research.
And, for what it's worth, I can flat-out moo like a hungry calf or an upset mama cow, too.
It's like when I'm standing in front of a room ful of eggheads, like I'm fixing to do in October to talk about some research.
If I try to sound like them, I sound like a dolt. I speak pidgeon-egghead.
If I talk like I talk, I sound like who I am: a redneck who's done a bunch of research.
And, for what it's worth, I can flat-out moo like a hungry calf or an upset mama cow, too.
The cows on my uncle's farm in NY said "Mmmmmmmm-EH? What are you gonna do?"
OK, I added the second part, but that's really what they sounded like.
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OK, I added the second part, but that's really what they sounded like.
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