Friday, March 10, 2006
Hell is (----------).
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Four Aces and a Joker:
"War is Hell"
--General W.T. Sherman
"If I owned Hell and Texas I would rent out Texas and live in Hell."
--General Philip Henry Sheridan
“Hell begins on the day when God grants us a clear vision of all that we might have achieved, of all the gifts which we have wasted, of all that we might have done which we did not do”
--Gian Carlo Menotti
"Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.”
--Mark Twain
"Through clever and constant application of propaganda, people can be made to see paradise as hell, and also the other way round, to consider the most wretched sort of life as paradise.”
--Adolph Hitler
"War is Hell"
--General W.T. Sherman
"If I owned Hell and Texas I would rent out Texas and live in Hell."
--General Philip Henry Sheridan
“Hell begins on the day when God grants us a clear vision of all that we might have achieved, of all the gifts which we have wasted, of all that we might have done which we did not do”
--Gian Carlo Menotti
"Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.”
--Mark Twain
"Through clever and constant application of propaganda, people can be made to see paradise as hell, and also the other way round, to consider the most wretched sort of life as paradise.”
--Adolph Hitler
# posted by 
: 8:27 AM
: 8:27 AM
Hell is ER wantin' a bunch of posts.
Hell is anything Maness writes.
Hell is watching the Pittsburgh Steelers sneak into the playoffs in front of the Chiefs, then the Steelers win the Super Bowl.
Hell is working for the SE at the largest paper in OK.
Hell is popping a viagra and having your wife tell you that she has a "problem down there."
Hell is anything Maness writes.
Hell is watching the Pittsburgh Steelers sneak into the playoffs in front of the Chiefs, then the Steelers win the Super Bowl.
Hell is working for the SE at the largest paper in OK.
Hell is popping a viagra and having your wife tell you that she has a "problem down there."
Teditor, why are you picking on Mark? We disagree all the time, but I consider him a bloggy buddy.
He's done run hisself off from here a time or two 'cause people pick on him. I mean, lay into anything he writes -- but don't pick on the guy hisself.
He's done run hisself off from here a time or two 'cause people pick on him. I mean, lay into anything he writes -- but don't pick on the guy hisself.
Hell is sitting down beind your desk at work at 9 a.m. sharp, ready to rock-n-roll -- and it taking TWENTY minutes to get the GOLDARN computer contraption up and running!
Of course early Christians did not believe in Hell. The earliest Christian were Jewish and the Jewish religion has no hell. Hell was actually formulated and detailed in one of those "gospels" since rejected by the church.
# posted by : 9:43 AM
: 9:43 AM
Hell is separation from God and God's ways.
It will therefore come as a surprise to many folk when they realize that they have separated themselves from the God who loves the poor and down and out, the oppressed, God's creation, etc.
My son had a cool, twisted idea for a reality TV show. In it, you would convince someone that they were dying and, at the end, put them to sleep to simulate death and then, when they woke up, they'd find themselves in a Heaven run by the very people they fear, ignore or outright despise here on earth.
(Can you imagine a homophobe waking up in a heaven where God is a Lesbian chick? A racist waking up in a heaven where God's black or Muslim? What evil fun! bwa-ha-ha!!)
It will therefore come as a surprise to many folk when they realize that they have separated themselves from the God who loves the poor and down and out, the oppressed, God's creation, etc.
My son had a cool, twisted idea for a reality TV show. In it, you would convince someone that they were dying and, at the end, put them to sleep to simulate death and then, when they woke up, they'd find themselves in a Heaven run by the very people they fear, ignore or outright despise here on earth.
(Can you imagine a homophobe waking up in a heaven where God is a Lesbian chick? A racist waking up in a heaven where God's black or Muslim? What evil fun! bwa-ha-ha!!)
BTW: That How would I look as M.Div now looks like a cutline for the Newhart-in-devil-suit pic!!
LOL!
LOL!
# posted by : 12:17 PM
: 12:17 PM
Being cast into outer darkness compounded by forever having the memory of everything you've ever done or said that is contrary to God's will, all alone, for all eternity.
Or,
discovering half a pickle on your chik-fillet chicken sandwich, and realizing that awful taste in your mouth is PICKLE!
Or,
discovering half a pickle on your chik-fillet chicken sandwich, and realizing that awful taste in your mouth is PICKLE!
Wait a sec. Who doesn't like pickles? :-) Mark, you'da never made it through them eight jars that Andy and Barn wolfed down to save Aunt Bee's feelers!
... havin't to rush through a quick 45-minute lunch with Drlobojo.
Good to see ya, man.
(Frog legs. The beff-pork denial continues! Next year, I think I'll give up batter for Lent.) ...
Good to see ya, man.
(Frog legs. The beff-pork denial continues! Next year, I think I'll give up batter for Lent.) ...
... would be givin' up batter for Lent, in Oklahoma or Texas, where dang near everything comes chicken-fried!
OK. Back to work.
OK. Back to work.
'Twas a joke, folks. 'Twas a joke. Figured Mark'd get it. Knew ER would.
Figured wrong. Next time I'll throw in the smiley face. Sheesh
Figured wrong. Next time I'll throw in the smiley face. Sheesh
Give up batter???
You'll give up:
chicken fried steak
chicken fried chicken
fried catfish
hushpuppies (they ain't nothin but batter)
Kentucky fried and every other kind of fried chicken
frog legs
corn dogs
pancakes
waffles
fried pickles
fried green tomatoes
breaded okra
fried eggplant
pigs in a poke
crepes
hoe cake
lamb fries
calf fries
deep fried ice cream
fried shrimp
everything from Long John Silver's
????? All that and more????
Hell, ER you might as well be on the Atkins diet.
You'll give up:
chicken fried steak
chicken fried chicken
fried catfish
hushpuppies (they ain't nothin but batter)
Kentucky fried and every other kind of fried chicken
frog legs
corn dogs
pancakes
waffles
fried pickles
fried green tomatoes
breaded okra
fried eggplant
pigs in a poke
crepes
hoe cake
lamb fries
calf fries
deep fried ice cream
fried shrimp
everything from Long John Silver's
????? All that and more????
Hell, ER you might as well be on the Atkins diet.
# posted by : 8:52 PM
: 8:52 PM
"Of course early Christians did not believe in Hell."
Jesus did, according to the Gospel of Matthew, and spoke specifically of hell, the fires of hell, and "eternal punishment." Doesn't sound like such a nice place to me.
Jesus did, according to the Gospel of Matthew, and spoke specifically of hell, the fires of hell, and "eternal punishment." Doesn't sound like such a nice place to me.
# posted by : 9:35 PM
: 9:35 PM
...I do agree with Dan that it might best be described as separation from God, but whatever it is like, I do believe there is a penalty after this life for the truly unrepentently evil.
# posted by : 9:52 PM
: 9:52 PM
The Jews believed in Sheol.
The Greeks believed Hades.
Jesus spoke exclusively about Gehenna.
ER has given you sites that define these three places, or you can look them up yourself in an encycolpedia.
None of these places are the Hell that I was taught to believe in. Where did it come from?
That is the point of ER's post. Read the post then write.
The Greeks believed Hades.
Jesus spoke exclusively about Gehenna.
ER has given you sites that define these three places, or you can look them up yourself in an encycolpedia.
None of these places are the Hell that I was taught to believe in. Where did it come from?
That is the point of ER's post. Read the post then write.
# posted by : 11:28 PM
: 11:28 PM
Thank you brother.
I think all of them were planted in the hearts of man by God to point us to the truth of an everlasting and eternal system of good and evil, and a final justice in the world.
As for the point of ER's post, I thought it was simply to republish that funny Bob Newhart picture. :-)
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I think all of them were planted in the hearts of man by God to point us to the truth of an everlasting and eternal system of good and evil, and a final justice in the world.
As for the point of ER's post, I thought it was simply to republish that funny Bob Newhart picture. :-)
# posted by : 12:23 AM
: 12:23 AM << Home
